Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Randomize
