Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
Randomize
