It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
Randomize