Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
