So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
is that a dick in a sweater?
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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