So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
Randomize