just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
Even my vagina gasped.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
Randomize
