Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
how do you play pong handcuffed?
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
