Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
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