Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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