Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
Randomize
