Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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