if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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