I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
I figure blowing aggressively into a harmonica is better than screaming, "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU SOCIOPATHIC SUCCUBUS" to my sister, in the middle of an auditorium, during my mothers college graduation ceremony.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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