just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
Randomize
