remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
Btw, remind me to tell you about how I had to cancel my crazy wild sex plans with Will b/c my roommate came back from his trip after a day b/c Canada wouldn't let him in. Fucking cockblock.
Actually that's the whole story. You don't have to remind me.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
