He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
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