**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
My legs feel like baby dolphins
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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