I just made out with a guy for $7.
dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
Randomize
