Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
Randomize
