you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
bring money and cleavage
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
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