We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Floor bacon is actually really good
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
