He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
I'm walking home wearing Kermit the frog footie pajamas, carrying a monogrammed shot glass set with my name on it. It's fucking Christmas!
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Randomize
