i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
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