brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
Randomize