Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize