She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
