We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
meet me or not, i'm out of control
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
Randomize
