ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
my soul wont recognize me after tonight
If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
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