I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
Just woke up wearing a top hat and simpsons boxers. i also found more money in my wallet then what i had before going out, about $1000 more
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
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