This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
I have tasted many bathrooms
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Randomize
