xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
God I need to hump something, right now.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
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