I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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