Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Randomize
