I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
Randomize
