we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
Randomize
