He is an equal opportunity slut.
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
that is very illegal...i love you.
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