Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
I can't believe I forgot to wish you a happy 13 week-iversary of the time you raw-dogged a rando. Only two days late, so it still counts. And since your 14 weeks is coming up, you should know that at 14 weeks your baby can squint, frown, grimace, pee, and possibly suck his/her/their/zir thumb!
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Randomize
