Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
This can only be settled by a dance off.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Randomize
