Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
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