I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Randomize
