Screwed.edu
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
Randomize
