so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
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