Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
Blood and glitter go together right?
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Randomize
