So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
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