I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
