How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Randomize