I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Randomize
