doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
Is it acceptable to pay for WiFi on flights solely for the purpose of getting on Tinder to find a sugar daddy on the plane that doesn’t mind upgrading me to first class?
Do it. You’re flying for two weddings. You’re gonna need that first class.
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
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