i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
Randomize
